We often throw around the term “burn out” a little too casually, I think. Being “burned out” doesn’t mean you wish you had more vacation days or you don’t want to work on the project your boss sent down the pipeline to you. It doesn’t mean that you’d at wit’s end with your jackhole co-workers or you’re frustrated with your tiny paycheck. Burn out goes a lot deeper than that. I can include all of the above elements, but burn out is when you are physically and mentally incapable of doing your job well because you feel apathy toward whatever you’re doing. Even thinking about the job leaves you feeling exhausted and upset.

The biggest secret to beating burn out is to never get there in the first place. Take it from someone who knows: If you’re burned out on your job, a vacation isn’t likely to make you feel better. In fact, it will probably make you feel worse. Yet, that’s the cure most people prescribe! Why?

Well, when you’re burned out on a project, the common opinion is that you need to get away from it. You need a break. That’s true. So you go on vacation or, at the very least, you work on something else. But what does this do?

• In the moment, it makes you dread the thought of returning to work, so it is hard to truly relax.
• When you get back, it makes you wish you were still on vacation, since you had a good time. That snowballs into feeling even worse about the work you have to do.

Burn out isn’t easily cured through time away from the work. Instead, I believe the best “cure” is to never feel burned out in the first place. It’s about prevention, my friends.

Before you start to hate going into work ever day, take some vacation time. It you wait until your cell phone literally dies from lack of battery charge, you have to wait a few minutes after plugging it in before you have enough juice to make a call again. On the other hand, if you plug it in when the battery is only half-way drained, you can keep talking non-stop. Recharge your battery before you’re running on E.

It’s also important to recognize the difference between burn out and true lack of passion for what you’re doing. Sometimes, the jobs we love simply lose their appeal for us. There’s nothing wrong with moving on to a new career, even if you’ve worked in a job you loved for twenty years. It’s scary, but don’t let fear keep you from loving what you do every day.

I think burn out happens to all of us from time to time. It can really sneak up on ya! Tell me, have you ever experienced burn out? What’s your cure for dealing with those feelings?

Ew. That sounds really nasty.

I know, that does sound gross. But it’s the best way to describe what I mean, so work with me here.

There are a lot of things I want to do in life. In relation to my career, that often means I start new projects before old ones have taken off. I often joke that I wish someone would pay me to sit around and think up cool ideas, but that I could pass them on to someone else for the follow-through. It’s not that I’m not passionate about or dedicated to my ideas; it’s just that I usually like the process more than the finish line.

The end result is that I haven’t been so good at presenting finished projects, all tied up in neat little packages like people want them. I don’t think I’m alone in this.

Imagine yourself as a watering can, filled to the brim. In order to water your flowers, you have to make it across a room. Only before you start your journey, someone pricks you with a thousand little needles, so you’re leaking water everywhere.

Now, in and of itself, a pin prick isn’t going to do much harm. You’ll still make it to the flowers and give them a nice long drink. But if the holes start to add up, your water levels drop pretty drastically by the time you get to the flowers. Not only have you make a huge mess all over the floor, but the flowers barely get a dribble.

The flowers represent whatever it is you’re working on in life, whether that’s building a freelance business or writing a book or launching a product or working at an office job. All those little pin pricks are the things you want to do in life, the things you could be doing instead, the things that might make you happy. The water is your time, energy, and creative juice. It works the same as with the watering can – if you have too many pin prick distractions, you’ll never be able to make your flowers grow. In other words, you’ll never be truly successful at what you’re currently doing in life.

The way I see it, you have two choices:

1. Patch up the pin pricks in your watering can. Cut out the distractions in your life. FOCUS.
2. Admit that you don’t really give a damn about the fucking flowers and move on to something you do care about.

Both are good options. It can just be hard to tell which is the right path for you. I’m not sure it’s a skill I’ve developed myself, but I’m certainly working on it.

The problem is, your pin prick ideas, the distractions that are causing you to leak time, energy, and creativity all over the place? They’re shiny and new. It’s like the new hottie at work versus your spouse. Of course his or her cute butt is going to turn your head, but is that really a replacement for the dedication and long-lasting love of your marriage?

On the other hand, if you’re doing something you’re not truly enjoying anymore, you might regret wasting so much time being unhappy when you could be chasing a new dream. Are you only continuing down the same path because it’s safe or because you feel pressured to do so?

I don’t have an answer for you, but what I can tell you is that you aren’t alone in your career indecisiveness. Making decisions is hard, yo.

What I do know is that it is time to stop being so leaky. You can’t be successful in limbo. Patch up those pin prick holes or forget about the flowers altogether. Don’t be so paralyzed by fear that you don’t make a decision at all.

I thought, “What do I price it for the sale? Hm…”

The book regularly costs $21. My initial thought was to set the sale price at $15. If you follow the advice in this book, you’ll make your money back 100 times over.

But it’s Thanksgiving weekend. I want to say thank you, and $15 just won’t accurately describe how very thankful I am for all of your support. The people who read my work here, on Blog Zombies, on the BlogWorld blog, and everywhere else I write…you guys mean everything to me. Without you guys, I wouldn’t be able to pay my rent. Y’all are truly awesome.

So for TODAY ONLY, as my “thank you” to everyone out there, Out of Thin Air is available for the “pay what you can” price! That means you can enter whatever number you want when you hit the buy button – even ZERO! Those who know me know that I don’t do sales very often, so if you want to pick it up, you gotta do it TODAY. Get the ebook for free – hell, send copies to everyone you know if you want!

You can grab the ebook and read more about it here. Again, once you hit the buy button, it will allow you to put ANY number in the price box or even set it to $0! If you do pick it up, the only thing I ask is that you tweet about it, send a Facebook message, email you friends, or otherwise spread the word so that people in your life can get it for free as well.

Thank you all SO much. <3

Until the end, that is. At the end of Mean Girls, all the characters decide that their shenanigans aren’t worth it, that they need to stop gossiping about one another and being so petty and just enjoy life. The mean girls club dissolves and everyone is happy.

Life doesn’t really work that way. In real life, there are still a lot of gossiping, petty mean girls (and boys) in the world. I imagine there are mean girls in nursing homes. It certainly doesn’t end in high school. Mean girls are everywhere.

One of my number one career tips is this: don’t be one of them.

You’re going to have opinions about your coworkers, your friends, your neighbors, your mailman…everyone. I’m not proposing that you be fake-nice to everyone. If you don’t like someone, you don’t like them. But being a mean girl can eat at your soul…and in career terms, it can eat at your opportunities.

If you don’t like someone, keep them out of your life as much as possible.

If you disagree with someone, debate the issue respectfully.

If someone is mean to you, ignore it or attempt to resolve the issue amicably.

If you’re a member of the mean girl’s club, you’ll burn bridges, which could really hurt your career down the road. Worse yet, you’ll start to get a reputation. People who aren’t even really in your life will start to avoid you because they don’t want to deal with the drama they’ve heard you cause.

Don’t be the person that people avoid. Being feared isn’t good for your career. Trust me on that one.

This was my senior year "freaking out" face. Miller light may have played a role in said expression.

It’s that time of year again – the time when college seniors are signing up for classes for their final semester, making graduation plans, and FREAKING THE FUCK OUT.

It’s going to be okay. I promise.

Right now, you probably feel alone, like everyone has their life figured out except you. Bob has three job offers. Mary just got into grad school. Joe and Jane are in a stable relationship. Kate already has an apartment and roommate lined up.

No matter what your friends have, no one has everything figured out. Bob’s three job offers are all in cities where he doesn’t know anyone. Mary got into grad school but doesn’t know how she’s going to pay for it. Joe and Jane have each other, but no job leads. Kate’s got the apartment and roommate but has no idea what she wants to do career-wise. Everyone is freaking out about something, regardless of how calm they are on the outside.

And to be honest, this is often the case in “real” life as well. I’m 26 and still don’t have it all figured out. My parents are in their 50s and still have stresses in life. We all put on a happy face, but everyone has problems.

Right now, your life is super unstable – probably the most “in limbo” you’ll ever be. It’s difficult and frustrating and it’s okay to break down and cry. But it will be okay. I PROMISE. Things work out for everyone, and although you might not always get the best job or even make the “right” decisions, nothing lasts forever. You can always change your mind. Just keep moving forward. Don’t let fear paralyze you.

And if you need advice? Don’t be afraid to ask. Ask me, ask your friends, ask your family…just ask. We all want to help you. You aren’t alone.

A few truth bombs:

• When you stop for Starbucks on your way to the protest, I can’t take you seriously. You’re missing the entire point. Stop jumping on the bandwagon and protesting stuff you don’t even understand because it feels like the cool thing to do. Do you understand how the government works? Do you know why the United States is in debt and so many people are out of work? Do you have any idea which of the companies you’re protesting have ethical practices and which do not? Dude, if the reason you’re protesting is that you want more money, just stay home.

• For a protest to be effective, there needs to be a goal, a solution, something the people you’re protesting can stop doing to make you go away. There is no unifying goal to this protest, nothing anyone can do to appease the protesters. I know, you want to end corruption. Well of course you do – but how? It’s a process. So what, is the protest just never going to end? The types of changes these protestors want is going to take a long time. We need ACTIONABLE ideas.

• Stop equating “rich and successful” to “corrupt.” They are not the same things. Rich people can be good and poor people can be bad, and that extends to corporations as well. It isn’t so black and white.

Instead of going to a stupid Occupy protest where you’re not making a difference AT ALL, try doing some of these things instead:

1. Get a damn job.

Seriously, not to sound like your mother, but if you’re living on unemployment, you’re part of the problem. Unemployment is supposed to help you make ends meet until you can get another job, not so you can sit on your fat ass and watch TV every day until it runs out. If you aren’t working at least 40 hours a week, you should be using that time to job hunt. YES, 40 HOURS PER WEEK. I honestly believe that in order to qualify for unemployment, you should have to spend 40 hours a week either at a job hunting center/going on interviews/etc. or volunteering.

And if you aren’t finding anything, maybe you need to reevaluate. Stop thinking that jobs are “below” you. I don’t care how many years of experience you have as a manager. There’s a secretary position open. Take it so you can get off unemployment and continue to job hunt in your free time for something better. Part of the reason this country is so messed up is that there are too many people taking advantage of the welfare that is supposed to help people who are actually in need.

2. Shop at small businesses.

I know, I know. It costs $20 to buy a book at that independent bookstore and you could get it on Amazon for $10. So buy fewer books. When it comes to things you need, like diapers and food, I don’t blame you one bit for going wherever the prices are lowest. Walmart is your friend. When it comes to stuff you want, though, support a small business, even if it means buying shit less often. That’s how you can protest big businesses – with your dollars.Christmas is coming. Head to Etsy instead of the malls.

3. Get an education.

Seriously, if you say you can’t afford it, I don’t buy it. Do you know how much financial aid is available for students? Like, crazy amounts. You just have to make the effort to apply for it. You might not be able to afford that pricey private school, but you can totally afford to take a class at a local community college. I went full time while also working 15 hours a week for my college AND freelancing 10 – 20 hours per week. You can handle a single class. Better education = a better job.

More importantly, if your problem is finding a job, don’t get an education in something like Greek History. I’m 100% in favor of you following your dreams and doing something you love, but have a damn plan. The point of education is to get a job after you graduate. If you have no idea how your passion is going to translate to a job, you’re doing it wrong. Figure. It. Out.

Oh, and also worth mentioning: you don’t have to spend a dime to get educated in many cases. Community centers offer free computer classes. Unpaid internships give you real-world experiences. Volunteer programs train you for free. Hell, even online there are tons of free videos and other classes you can use to learn valuable skills. And remember that library thing? Yeah, it has a lot of super educational books that can teach you stuff – for free! I know reading might be a foreign concept to some of you, but I assure you that it really isn’t so bad.

4. Downsize your life.

You don’t need that huge house. You don’t need that new car. You don’t need those designer shoes. If you can afford all these things, yes, please buy them! I believe a person has the right to spend their money however they want. But stop buying more and more and more shit that you can’t afford. If you have credit card debt, you don’t get to go on vacation to Aruba this year. That’s how it’s supposed to work. Don’t spend money you don’t have on things you don’t need. Live with less until you get your own finances under control. When you default on your mortgage or declare bankruptcy, do you think that debt just *poof* disappears??? It doesn’t – it effects the entire economy.

5. Get on birth control.

Yes, you can afford it because Planned Parenthood will give you a check-up and prescription FOR FREE if you don’t have income. Seriously, if I see one more unwed mother-to-be crying that she doesn’t have the money to pay for her baby, I’m going to vomit. Until you can afford a baby, BE RESPONSIBLE WITH YOUR PRIVATE PARTS.

6. Run for office.

Seriously, you want to change the government? Put your money where you mouth is and run for an office. You don’t have to run for president (yet), but start with running for a small local office and work your way up from there. The only way we can truly change things at a national political level is by having honest, hard-working people in local government first. Be that person.

OR vote for that person. Get to know your local candidates and support the people who most closely connect with your own ideas. Make a contribution or, if you can’t, volunteer. Lick envelopes for them. Put up those god-awful roadsigns. Go door to door. Whatever. But stop blanket-voting Republican or Democrat. And realize that sometimes even the candidate who votes a certain way isn’t the best person for the job. I’d rather see someone honest and communicative in office even if then vote for policies I don’t like than someone who agrees with my personal opinions but is corrupt. Put people you deserve to be in power in those seats rather than staying party-loyal. Make informed decisions and encourage others to do the same.

7. Do some research.

Like I said at the top of this post, not all rich people are bad. Likewise, not all big corporations are bad. Some actually do a lot of good in this world, reward their employees at every level, and are making the world a better place. Before you blanket protest Wall Street, take some time to research whom you’re protesting. Show support with your dollars to the companies that are doing good things and protest the corrupt companies, politicians, banks, etc. individually.

Basically, my argument boils down to three key elements:

1. TAKE RESPONSIBILITY. It is your fault if you bought a house you couldn’t afford. It is your fault if you have too many mouths to feed on your paycheck. It is your fault if you can’t find a job because you went to school to be a lion tamer. It is your fault if you opened ten credit card accounts. All these things do not mean that know one else is to blame (depending on your situation), but chances are pretty good that you at least share the blame for your shitty life. Take responsibility.
2. YOU ARE NOT ENTITLED TO HAPPINESS. In the United States, you get life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. If you don’t pursue it, you aren’t going to find it. In other words, you have to work really effing hard for the things you want in life if you aren’t lucky enough to be born with a trust fund or inheritance handed to you.
3. STOP MAKING EVERYTHING US VERSUS THEM. There are good people and there are bad people. There are good companies and there are bad companies. Money doesn’t corrupt people. Greed corrupts people. Just because you have a lot of money doesn’t mean you’re greedy.

I think I could rant about this dumb Occupy thing all day, but I’ll end here. I’ve said enough and I want your (respectful) options. I’ll leave you with one final thought before opening things up to comments: It really is a shame that so many of the protestors out there are so misguided. Because people coming together like this to call for change, that’s what should happen. There are a lot of good ideas floating around that could really help this country, but they’re being drowned out by insane cries of entitlement. As a human race, we’re better than that.

Aren’t we?

I’m a girl who likes her goals. Trust me. I used to write them all on a big list on my bedroom wall and cross them off one by one as I finished them. Today, I’m a little less anal about tracking my goals, but I still have a pretty long list and I always encourage others to make their lists too.

And yet…and yet…

I think my life, right now, is enough.

I have my goals. I have my projects. But when someone asks what I’m doing next, I say, “This.” I don’t need a next project or a next client or a next anything. What I really need is to slow down and enjoy now.

Maybe it’s an American thing? That feeling to need to be better. As though having a bunch of new goals somehow makes you a better, happier person. Well, it’s okay to look around and realize that you’re pretty darn happy right now. I mean, be honest with yourself. If you hate going to work every day, dislike your boss, and can’t stand your co-workers, you probably do need to be asking yourself what’s next in your career. But it’s also okay to say that you love your current job and you hope to be in it for a long time – yes, even if you’re a janitor or a bus driver or a waitress. You don’t have to hold yourself up to others’ standards. You don’t have to be better. You’re already pretty darn awesome if you love what you’re doing.

Ask yourself this: when is enough enough? When do you have enough money? When do you have enough social status? When is your career enough? Maybe that time is right now.

My first BlogWorld was about a year ago. Before that, I was freelancing full-time, and although I was making enough to pay my bills, it was still a month-to-month struggle. I wasn’t saving any money or paying more than the minimum on my credit card every month. I was successful, but then, I guess it depends on your definition of the word. It was nice to be building a business. It was not-so-nice to barely even be able to afford a night out with friends.

By a silly set of lucky coincidences, I got an email from BlogWorld asking if I was interested in working with them on their blog. I said yes. Actually, I think I might have read the email about seven times in disbelief before shouting yes. Being able to work with these amazing people has been a dream come true…but even if you don’t work for BlogWorld, going to the even will change your life.

I consider myself a smart person, but before I attended BlogWorld, I didn’t know how much I didn’t know, if that makes sense. It was overwhelming, and I just marinated in information during my time there. I still go back and watch some of the videos from that event. I promptly came home and started working on new projects.

But BlogWorld was about more than just learning new things. Let’s face it; if you want education, you can find it online. You don’t need to actually go to an event. It might not be as convenient to track down information yourself, but you can do it.

What you can’t do by yourself online that BlogWorld makes so very possible is networking. I went from a few hundred Twitter followers to over a thousand during BlogWorld and the weeks afterward. More importantly, I actually connected with those followers. Dare I say…I made friends. People began to recognize my name.

And that’s what it takes to succeed in this field after graduation. Name recognition. If you don’t have that, you don’t have squat.

In just a year, I went from struggling to secure in my online business, and I have BlogWorld to thank for that. Today, I have more freelance offers than I’m able to complete, so I can pick and choose the best gigs. I also was able to move to the Washington DC metro, where the cost of rent is much higher than my previous housing in Pennsylvania, and I work fewer hours for clients, instead spending more free time on hobbies and personal projects rather than working 80 hours a week to make ends meet. I’ve kept in touch with many of the people that I met at that original BlogWorld, and most are happy to recommend me for gigs. So, if I ever find myself without work, all I have to do is ask!

BlogWorld WILL change your life.

I know the price to get there can be a little hard to swallow, especially if you’re flying in from the East Coast or another country. It’s worth it. Without a doubt, you will make your money back as long as you actually make an effort to do so after you get home. There are some good deals on official BlogWorld hotels, and if you get your tickets in the next few days, you’ll even be able to save some money on them.

Also, you’ll get to meet me, which is totally priceless. :-p

Here’s the link to find out more, one more time. Please join us and tell your friends, especially if you’re currently a student are a recent graduate. We need more young minds representing at BlogWorld, bringing a fresh perspective to this industry. We need YOU.

Can’t wait to see you there.

But no one wants to hire a loser.

When it comes to your career, being humble isn’t going to cut it. You don’t have to be an arrogant prick, but if you don’t think you’re hot stuff, why should an employer think you are? I’m not advocating acting like a complete ass; I feel like I need to make that clear, so I’ll say it again: I’m not advocating acting like a complete ass. We don’t need to hear how awesome you are every two minutes, even if you are in full job hunting mode. But when you’re asked about your skills, be confident and strut your stuff, baby.

If you don’t believe in yourself and aren’t confident in your skills, ask yourself why. Do you feel like you aren’t educated enough to compete. Are you lacking experience? Could you use more social proof? These are all things that can be changed. So change them! Rather than continuing to lack the confidence that every employee should have, take some time to better yourself so you feel more secure standing up and saying, “Yes! I am the best person for this job.”

The moral of the story is this: Rock on wit’ yer bad self! Don’t be so humble that others don’t even realize how awesome you are.

In the above picture, I’m on a boat, motherfucker.

But I’m not here to brag about a wonderful weekend spent by the bay in San Diego. I’m not here to brag that I got to drink beer on a boat. I’m not even here to brag that the weather was beautiful.

I’m here to brag that all of the above is true – and it was part of my job.

This weekend, I attended BlogHer with the BlogWorld Expo crew. I was there to learn, to make connections with potential sponsors, and to talk to people about our event. Part of doing that included hanging out on a boat with some of the cool people who support BlogWorld Expo and who we hope will check out the event in the future.

So my question to you is this: do you got your flippy floppies?

I realize that I’m extremely lucky to have a job where I get to travel to awesome locations and have fun even when I’m working, but even if that isn’t the case for you, you have to find a job where you get flippy floppies too. In other words, what about your job is special and makes you happy? What do you have to brag about?

Is it the free taco lunch your boss buys the whole office every Friday? Do you get to meet celebrities in your field? Is your benefits package awesome? Do employees get a major discount on products?

This isn’t just about perks either. Yeah, you want a perky job, but if you hate what you do, it don’t really matter if you fuck mermaids or not. Look for a job that makes you proud to say where you work. Find bosses and co-workers who treat you more like a member of the family than just another hire. Don’t settle until you have a position where you truly want the company to succeed and where you’d work for free if you could afford it.

If you don’t have that, you’re missing out. There’s absolutely no shame in working your way up from a “pay the bills” job on the bottom rung of the ladder, but don’t get stuck there forever. Always be working to find that job you really love so you can have pride in what you do. Eventually, if you work hard, you’ll be riding on a dolphin doing flips and shit too.

And in case you didn’t click the link to watch the video, here it is, because otherwise, all the references in this post will make no sense: