Douchebaggery seems to be the go-to method of getting hired for some people. I see it all the time. Not just kissing ass (though that is part of it), but truly being a douchebag. The ten rules of douchebags at the office:

  1. Deepthroat your bosses when they are around, but talk shit about them when they aren’t.
  2. Take other people’s ideas and present them as though they are your own.
  3. Live way above your means and brag about your awesome apartment or sweet ride to everyone at the office as though you’re making a lot more money than they are.
  4. Help yourself to other people’s shit without asking (food in the community fridge, tissues on others’ desks, etc.).
  5. Volunteer to do stuff, but never get around to doing it because you’re too busy with your own shit.
  6. Ask for favors not because you need help but because you just don’t want to do something.
  7. Be the reason every project is late.
  8. Make it your personal mission to hook up with everyone else in the office.
  9. Lie on your resume and during your job interview to get a job you don’t deserve.
  10. Vocally express your opinion about the shitty job everyone else is doing, because your own work is perfect.

I could probably go on, actually. You know the type. Office douchebags. And these guys (and gals) are found everywhere, not just in office environments. I know some who work virtually, for example. They’re everywhere.

The problem is, in an office environment, if can be pretty easy to slip into douchbaggery without even realizing it. It starts small - flirting with the girl in accounting or being late with a project because you were surfing Facebook. Soon it devolves and you become more and more of a douchebag until the other long-time employees remember a time when you were actually a cool dude/chick to hang out with after work and newer employees are being warned to stay away from you.

The worst part about it? Douchebags don’t like their jobs.

You may have loved the job when you took it, but if you turn into an office douchebag, you’ll start hating going to work. You have to be insincere about your bosses. You have to deal with people who can’t wait to get away from you. Your projects are increasingly drawn-out. Others get recognized for their work, while you seem to be spinning your wheels. For a douchebag, work sucks.

And no one wants that.

Being a douchebag might seem great at first, but it never lasts. Instead, be the guy the douchebags are trying to be - the one who is liked by his/her boss and coworkers, who has awesome possessions because of good spending habits an well-deserved promotions, who works with amazing people on interesting projects, who never has to lie about experience he/she is freaking awesome without the fibbing. It takes a little longer, but it doesn’t fade.

Image from jimbotfuzz.

Like what you read here? Stay connected with the After Graduation community and receive a free copy of Career Oomph!, a weekly newsletter to help you stay motivated to find that perfect job:

  1. It‘s quiet in here! Why not leave a response?

              General Career
              Job Hunting
              Tips and Tricks
              Site News

    Escaping the 9 to 5 Maren Kate's site is all about leaving the rat race to own your own business. She talks a lot about gaining freedom from the traditional work atmosphere and using virtual workers to achieve your entrepreneurship goals.

    Kommein An important part of job-hunting in most industries is social networking. Deb Ng's site is my favorite resource for learning more about using Twitter, Facebook, and other sites for more than telling people what you had for lunch and sharing party pictures.

    JobMonkey If you're at a loss when it comes to knowing what you want to do in life, JobMonkey is a great site to learn about career options. Their guides cover everything from truck driving to banking. They also have info about the training you'll need to work in these fields.

    Brass Tack Thinking At Brass Tack Thinking, Amber and Tamsen walk you through the process of making things happen, from developing your personal philosophy and brainstorming ideas to implementing those ideas to see real results in your life.

    Lifebeat Lifebeat is a weekly podcast from Nathan Hangen with music by Oleg Mokhov. Every Tuesday, you can listen to some energizing music along with motivational conversation and debate/discussion about concepts applicable to entrepreneurs and employees alike.

    You can find reviews I've done in the past at the following places; I'm always interested in doing more, so if you have something you'd like me to review, feel free to contact me.

    Higher Education This book by by Kenneth Jedding is about the feeling of failure you might feel as you're struggling to find the right path after graduation.

    Billing Boss If you're a freelancer or entrepreneur, Billing Boss is a tool you can consider to meet your invoicing needs. There are both pros and cons to the Billing Boss system.

    How to Write a German CV This ebook is specific to those job-hunting in Germany, but gives you a lot to consider for the non-US job application process in general.

    As you may know, I'm also involved in BlogWorld Expo, which is held annually. I've done some travel-related reviews which you can see here:
              -Border Grill

Switch to our mobile site